Erev Shabbos Chanukah 5775 – In Memoriam for Tzivia Chana bas Shmuel Shmelke HaLevi –
Susan Finn, beloved daughter of Chabad Founders Seymoure & Phyllis Finn
The primary event in Torah which talks to the tragedy we are gathered here for today, is the
description of Aharon Hakohein witnessing the death of his two sons. The verse describes his
reaction; Vayidom Aharon – and Aharon was silent.
Silent, because there are no words to express the unimaginable pain of a parent losing a child.
Silent, because as Yidden, Jews, we accept in silence for Blessed be you who is the Truthful Judge.
Silent, because man can never comprehend the thoughts of G‑d.
Silent, because in the stillness of the silence, much more is said than with any words.
Silent, because Aharon Hakohein who lit The Menorah witnessed his own two flames be extinguished.
We, in the midst of Chanukah and our menorah, have witnessed the pure and holy flame of Tzivia Chanah bas Shmuel Shmelke HaLevi – Suzy Finn, be extinguished. Or not.
Aharon went immediately back to lighting the Menorah. Jewish souls, Ner Hashem Nishmas Odom, the candle of G‑d is the soul of man, G‑d’s candles can never be extinguished.
Tuesday night, immediately after saying the last Kaddish for his father Chaim nota ben Binyomin HaLevi Yahrzeit, Shmuli went to visit Suzy at the hospital. She had been admitted due to her chronic liver condition. Shmuli shared, as sat in those two fateful hours at Suzy’s bedside in CCU, that Suzy had told him two things that night. First, how lucky she feels having been brought up by Shmuli and Phylliss as she knows, trusts and believes in Hashem, and because of this upbringing she can say with all of her heart, “whatever The Hashem wants” is fine with her. She is not afraid nor is she angry. She is at perfect peace.
No one ever had imagined that this was someone speaking hours before her passing. No, this was a daughter chatting with her father on Tuesday night, December 16th.
Several hours later Suzy’s liver shut down, she went into cardiac arrest and within a span of 6-7 hours she passed from this world. In hindsight, those few words spoke louder and prouder than any final words a Jew could possibly utter before leaving his/her mortal existence.
We know well the miracle of Chanukah. One small cruise of oil miraculously lasting 8 days. Suzy was that miraculous oil. Despite all of the many very difficult challenges that Suzy faced throughout her entire lifetime, hers was a transparent, genuine and indivisible love and connection to her parents, her siblings and Hashem.
Chanukah’s small cruise of oil was found deep in the rubble and destruction of the temple. Life’s realities are sometimes as harsh. In Suzy’s case they certainly exacted their force. But despite it all, she glowed. Suzy genuinely loved and was genuinely loved by all. Her eyes sparkled in joy, especially someone else’s joy.
Notwithstanding the “deck” she had been handed in life, Suzy’s Neshoma stayed intact, it remained whole. All who were lucky enough to know her, know that her’s was a heart and soul stamped and sealed with the goodness and kindness of He who is the source of these gifts.
This cruise of pure oil never allowed itself to be tainted or hardened by realities which would normally make one bitter, insensitive and callous. Not Suzy, hers was a life filled with oil to fuel the fire of life, everlasting and meaningful, as it remained connected to The Giver of all Life.
Supra-human, Supra-natural, a miracle of a cruise of pure Holy oil lasted, endured and lived amongst us, indeed. And it was Tzivia Chanah, Suzy Finn.
Terry, her friend of 18 years cared for Suzy with all of his heart and soul, Suzy will undoubtedly continue to watch over you, Terry, no doubt.
Her brothers Kenny – Chaim Nota and Yossi who just arrived of his plane from Eretz Yisroel having received the call yesterday morning, to you Suzy says my dear brothers, your/our relationship was blessed and will remain forever.
To her cousins who are here, one whom Suzy spoke with every single day – Sharon Schochet from Chicago and her local cousin whom she spent so much time with – Ilana and her cousin from the west coast of Florida Sandra and her husband Bob, Suzy was blessed to have you, as I am sure you feel blessed to have had her. Do not let go.
Suzy’s Neshoma was inextinguishable during her lifetime, how much more so now that she has been released from the body which failed her. Hold on tight, for Suzy will be there wherever and whenever you let her in.
Michael Finn represents all of Suzys beloved nephews and nieces, each of whom she adored, and each of whom adored her.
But the individuals who knew Suzy the most and the longest are our very special Shmuli and Phyllis, her father and mother. To them, this loss is inconsolable. Torah’s guide, silence, is perhaps our only and best offering to these beautiful human beings.
But it is imperative that you know, Shmuli and Phyllis that in this silence is packed an infinite amount of love, comfort, sympathy. In our silence is folded our own pain, for just seeing you in such agonizing pain is much too painful for us to bear.
These sentiments, and so much more, are the inaudible cries of this silence.
On behalf of Dinie, myself and all who are gathered here and many, many others who could not be here today; Shmuli and Phyllis you are truly extra-ordinary people. If we would only be able to lift this pain from you, it would be gone in an instant. Since we cannot, we feel utterly helpless.
But we all know, as you should, forever, that this girl, this lady, your daughter could not have been blessed with better parents in this world. She knew it. She expressed it and everyone here and all who know you, know this to be the absolute truth. There could be no better parents, than you.
As Yidden, Jews, we believe in the world to come. We believe in Gan Eden. Commensurate with a Jew’s suffering in this world, their share in the next is enlarged and enhanced. For whatever the Divine reason, your Tzivia Chanah lived 53 years here on earth. 53 is the numerical equivalent of Gan and with this perhaps Hashem is telling you that hers will be an automatic and seamless entry into Gan Eden.
Erev Shabbos, Chanukah, having lived for 53 years with us in body, now that 53 years will be rewarded by The Gan Eden she deserves. For the Talmud tells us that he who leaves this world on Erev Shabbos – siman yofeh lo – it is a good sign. It is a sign that their journey here on earth was always about a higher objective than our naked eyes could see. Their neshama was preparing for Shabbos their whole lives. Preparing for the day when they will be once again with Hashem – Shabbos Umenucha lchayei olomim.
May Tzivia Chanah go onto that perfect peace, and become a good intermediary on behalf of her mother – Faiga, ensuring that she receives all the heavenly comforting she will need, on behalf of her devoted and loving father, Shmuly, on behalf of her whole family and all of her loved ones.
May Hashem give shmuli and Phyllis the needed strength to endure this trying time and may they be granted what they truly deserve, only good health and happiness together with their children, eineklach and extended family and their respective families until the coming of Moshiach, very speedily in our days.